Wednesday, July 1, 2009 @ 11:47 PM
one problem of mine is enough!
its killing me!
& then now,
i see my parents so disappointed.
i see my dad, i know he's speechless.
i see my mum crying.
i felt so dis-hearted
i cant do anything to help.
we can only prayed.
prayed that GOD will forgive our family.
no satan works in this family, please.
i admit, i am very weak.
whenever a problem arise, i will panic till i cant think straight.
i will start to complain, why? why? why?!
i get stucked as if there's something sucking my brain cells.
slowly, then i will start to think.
you gave us all this freaking problems to learn from it.
you gave me chances to meet hypocrites to learn from it.
you gave me tears to see how cruel this world is.
but-
help us, i dont want to drown in sorrows everyday.
i dont want to suffocate to death, not knowing the cause.
AND NOW! i realise, i understand.
what now i'm going through and 2 years ago,
how stupidly i fell into this world's trap.
i am learning to change myself.
cultivation :)
had a heart to heart talk with mum.
i know she's very sad, i can hear from the way she speaks.
she told me this, GOD will truly bless 2 people when its according to his will,
but if its the opposite way, he will slowly guide and lead us out of all this torments.
& right now, he's leading me out.
everything step i move, i can only seek for his blessings.
for i know, he will give me the best:)
& our time will come, to also recieve punishments.
i wont say much, cos i know GOD will also punished _____.
i didnt went to tell mum about my personal problem,
main reason, i dont want her to worry for me.
cos' she told me before,
eventually, you'll be the person who will get the most hurt.
but i'm stubborn, i didnt heed her advice,
my fault too. 大人讲的话有时候也要听的。
haha!
work life is fun!
:D and tiring also.
yawns. zzZz
at the same time,
i get to numb myself from all my problems.
soon, it will be over:)
we knelt down before your presence Lord, forgive us.
:)
i know you hear.
